For Her Own Good

She's not going to like it, and I'm a little late, but Alyssa is going to get a flu shot. I wanted to give it to her a month ago, but she kept on getting sick and they wouldn't give it to her while she was sick and running a fever. I've FINALLY gotten her well, so we're going to go. I need to get one as well, but I'm not as worried about ME as I am HER. I don't tend to put my fingers in my mouth and I try to avoid people (sick AND well) at all costs! I don't WANT to let them stick a needle in my baby girl. I was always the one blubbering and crying when she had to get her shots as a baby, but I know it's for her own good. The flu is a nasty thing and I want to keep my little girl as well as possible this winter!

Back To School

Today was Alyssa's first day back after her Thanksgiving holiday. It was her very first REAL holiday since she started to school. I just hate the whole thing sucked out loud. I had SO many things I wanted to do, none of which I managed to actually do, with the exception of going to Mississippi. Oh well. There's always Christmas, I suppose.

I always freak out when she goes to school. I guess it's because she's only been in school for right at three months and has been sick three times already. I just worry about all the contact she has with other kids when I'm not around to remind her not to put her fingers in her mouth after playing with a toy that a kid gave her after wiping snot off his or her nose. Nasty, I realize, but kids are nasty little creatures!! I've tried to instill in my child the importance of hand washing and keeping her hands away from her mouth, but she is still only five years old and doesn't remember EVERYTHING I've told her! All I can do is hope and pray, really.

My Turn Yet?

I'd like to get a little time too....a little time when I get to shuck my parental responsibilities and throw my kid off on someone else. I need a break just as much, if not more, than anyone else I know...and, yet, I'm the ONLY one who doesn't get that. I'll never, as long as I live, understand why God would give me a child KNOWING that I'm not going to have parents or in-laws to help me and offer me a break from time to time. I'm basically alone here. It's great, and I say that sarcastically. I will NEVER find this element of my life to be fair. I do the best I can. I'm devoted and faithful. I'm creative and selfless, in most cases. I always put my daughter ahead of myself and I've sacrificed SO much just so she can have things she wants or needs. So, when is it going to be MY turn to reap a benefit?

The Song In My Head

Ever since I rewatched yesterday's episode of General Hospital I've had this song stuck in my head. It was a real tearjearking moment, with Nikolas hysterical over Emily's dead body, pointing a gun at his own chest in a real "Romeo and Juliet" type moment, and Jason risking his own life for the love of Elizabeth, etc. Anyway, the song was called "Underneath the Night" and it's by a girl named Rie Sinclair. It's a beautiful song and I can't wait for it to be added to iTunes so I can buy it and put it on my iPod! I was in tears during that part of the show. I'm not sure if it was the song or the fact that they were displaying a type of love on that show that is unlike anything I've ever experienced myself and I'm pretty sure doesn't even exist in real life. Whatever it was, it struck an emotional cord with me.

Sick Baby

I had to take Alyssa to the doctor yesterday, after a coughing fit unlike anything I've ever seen in my child. They told me she has bronchiolitis. That's something I'm not familiar with, but they gave her an antibiotic, which is kinda silly, since bronchiolitis is viral and won't be cured with an antibiotic...but whatever! They also gave me some cough medicine which is about as powerful as a sugar pill and some Albuterol. I don't know what does what but I just want my baby well. It's miserable to hear her coughing and know that I can't do anything to help her.

On top of that, my mother in law is in the hospital again in Shreveport, so I've been doing the majority of Alyssa's illness by myself, because Greg has been in Shreveport with his mom and brother. I just want everyone to be okay so life can go on like normal again!!

Update Time

Well, she did it. She missed the party. I felt bad for her, because she REALLY wanted to go and was so disappointed that her fever lingered so she couldn't go. I just hope the mom doesn't think I wasn't telling the truth. I'm always so paranoid when it comes to things like that. I don't want anyone to think I'm avoiding their kid's party for whatever reason. I really wanted her to go to this one because this girl came to hers and paybacks are important to me. I did get a gift for her, though, which we will be delivering to school next week.

Aside from that, she seems to be feeling a bit better. Her temp was down to 99.0 last time I took it. The highest it got to was 101.1. Of course, as usual, I've been going it alone, which sucks. I need a day off!

Why Fridays???

My daughter is about 8 weeks into her first year of preschool. She only goes 3 days a week for 3 hours a day, so that's a total of 9 hours a week, and YET, we're going on our third illness. And, they ALWAYS start on Friday. And the last two have been the Friday before someone's birthday party on Saturday. She's been invited to three parties and is about to miss her second one out of the three. I'm seriously considering homeschooling next year because I can't take this stress! Luckily, this one doesn't seem too bad (knock on processed particleboard), so there's still a chance she might get to attend the party after all, and, at the very least, she might not miss another day of school. I just hate when she's under the weather.

Ten On Tuesday

Today's "Ten on Tuesday" theme is "10 Words to Describe Me". This should be fun!

1. Moody--seriously, I can go from 0 to bitch in NO time!

2. Impatient--when I want something, I want it NOW!!

3. Devoted--I may not be the most patient mom in the world, but I'm sure as heck dedicated to it!

4. Creative--I'm always looking for ways to express myself artistically.

5. Loud--I WILL be heard, no matter what!

6. Sentimental--I cry every year on my baby's birthday (and sometimes my own--only for a different reason!)

7. Childish--don't we ALL have our moments?????

8. Mental--I haven't eaten a meal in almost 4 years, for crying out loud....you don't get more crazy than that without being committed!

9. Overwhelmed--I want so much more out of my life than I know how to get.

10. Multi-faceted--this is the BEST word to describe me!

Naptime!

I've only been up a little over an hour, but I think I could take a nap! My sister and her boyfriend came in last night and spent the night here on their way to Arlington to pick up his "newsed" car and we stayed up talking until midnight. Then, I got up at 7:30, although I had been awake for a while. And now, at 8:47, I'm tired again. Luckily, I don't have all that much on my agenda for the day, so maybe I can get a nap later. I'm hoping that Tara and Kevin will decide to stay here again tonight, because I get very little time to really spend with my sister. Maybe they'll come back.

Game Day

I'll be the first one to say "who cares", generally, but this particular matchup should be fun to watch. LSU is playing Alabama today. The "fun" part is, Alabama's coach, Nick Saban, used to coach LSU and let them to the National Championship, which they won, in 2003. He decided to take a job coaching the Miami Dolphins and a lot of LSU fans got pretty fired up about that. So, now he's coaching Alabama and all the LSU fans are hoping for a HUGE win! I'm not sure if they'll get HUGE, but I know they have a good chance to win, because LSU is a great team. Don't get me wrong, I don't know much about football, nor do I care, but even I can read scores and records! GEAUX TIGERS!!!

Ready to Go!

Halloween is tomorrow and I'm ready! We went yesterday and finished up Alyssa's "Cinderella" costume and today, I went to her school and helped the director with the candy and goodies for tomorrow's "Treats on the Street". I got to help sort out and then deliver the treats to the local businesses they'll be going to. It was a lot of fun to do, and I know that it's for a good cause, because the kids will LOVE it!

So, after that, we'll go to dance class. Then, we'll do the Halloween thing tomorrow night. I don't know if we'll go trick-or-treating or if we'll hit a fall festival or something. I can't make up my mind, but either way, we'll do something fun for Alyssa!

Neglected

I've neglected my blog for the last couple of days. I'm still tired from tending to a sick kid (who seems to be on the mend, finally), getting her ready for school, getting myself ready every morning, feeding her, feeding the dog, taking the dog out, taking her to school, etc. ALL by myself! I've decided I might try to father the next one, because apparently, when you're the father, your sole responsibility is paying the bills, and you even get to complain about how you get no help with that! Sounds like the life to me!

So, I'm going to have to work on keeping my blog updated better. I've already gotten a lot of my "chores" out of the way...now all I have to do is straighten up my house, go pick up my kid, take her to the costume store, go to the grocery store, MAYBE the bank, carve a pumpkin, do some laundry, give my child a bath, wash her hair, feed her, and put her in bed. And, those are just the things I have PLANNED....every mother knows that there's ALWAYS something that just "comes up". *sigh* I wish I were still in the bed, too!

My Husband

I copied this from Loretta because I LUVS her! :) It's all about my husband!

Lots of questions about you and your hubby.

What is his name?
Gregory Shane Williamson

How long have you been together?
almost 7 years (next month)


How long did you date?
about a year and a half

How old is he?
36 (I like 'em OLD!!)

Who eats more?
Definitely him!

Who said I love you first?
I honestly don't remember!

Who is taller?
He is, but not by much

Who sings better?
Definitely me!

Who is smarter?
Hard to say....we both have our areas of expertise

Whose temper is worse?
Again, it depends....it's easier to set me off, but he tends to be louder and scarier ;)

Who does the laundry?
We both do...I do mine and our daughter's and he does his....we kinda take turns doing towels


Who does the dishes?
whoever decides to first

Who sleeps on the right side of the bed?
usually him, when we sleep together (he snores!)


Who pays the bills?
He does....I help when necessary and possible, but he does it for the most part

Who mows the lawn?
Bayou Boys...but he pays them!

Who cooks dinner?
Whoever takes a notion

Who drives when you are together?
It just depends....sometimes I do, sometimes he does

Who is more stubborn?
we both are....we're tauruses and butt heads on a regular basis!

Who is the first to admit when they are wrong?
Hmmmm....neither of us likes to do that, but I'd have to say I probably do it more than him (but that doesn't happen often, either, because I'm seldom wrong!) LOL!


Whose parents do you see the most?
My parents are dead, so we definitely see his mom more

Who kissed who first?
we were both "there", but he's the one who asked if he could kiss me (yes, he ASKED! Sweet, huh?)

Who asked who out?
I don't remember

Who proposed?
Alyssa....or should I say, the EPT with the pink line?


Who is more sensitive?
We both have our moments....I'm more emotionally sensitive, but he gets his feelings hurt easier, if that makes sense

Who has more friends?
He does...I keep moving too far away from mine!

Who has more siblings?
We have the same number of "real" siblings, but I think he has a couple of half-brothers out there somewhere

Who wears the pants in the family?
I'd like to say I did, so I wouldn't sound like a "yes sir" kind of a girl, but that wouldn't necessarily be true. At the same time, I don't feel like I'm "bossed around" all that much, so maybe we both do.

The Day's Events

Today was Alyssa's first time to go to school in almost a week. Technically, she didn't even go TO school. We met her class up at the pumpkin patch. It was fun for the kids. They decorated tiny pumpkins (gourds, actually) and played and learned about pumpkins and heard a story. Then they went outside and played for a bit, running around among the pumpkins. After that, we went out to the park for a classmate's birthday party. It was a LOT of outside time and it was COLD outside, so I'm praying that I didn't make a wrong decision in letting her go. She was looking so forward to it that I hated to make her miss it, but I just hope her cough doesn't get worse as a result. So far, so good, but time will tell!

Worry Wart

I'll admit it. I'm almost psychotic when it comes to my daughter. I'm sure she thinks I'm a nut. Any time she acts a little "off", I'm constantly asking her, "how do you feel?", "Does your tummy hurt?", "Does your throat hurt?", etc. I just can't help it. I'm obsessed with my child's health and it worries ME. Earlier she was complaining with a sore throat and then she went to sleep, which is odd for her. Now, she's awake and she's playing and she doesn't feel warm and she says her throat isn't hurting, but I don't know. I just hate not knowing what's going on in my child's mind and/or her body. This "mother" thing is hard!!

I'm A Bad Mom

I'm a terrible mommy. I make my child take her school clothes off when she gets home. I make her wash her hands before she eats and after she uses the potty and after she plays with the dog. I make her go to bed at 8:00 and I make her eat vegetables. I make her say "please" and "thank you" and "excuse me" and "I'm sorry". I make her take small bites of her food and chew them up well before she swallows. I make her take a bath and wash her hair on a regular basis. When she's sick, I make her take medicine and rest. I make her come inside when it's dark and I make her wear bug spray when she's outside. I'm a mean, bad, horrible mommy and one day she'll thank me for it, especially when SHE becomes a "mean, bad, horrible" mommy herself!

I Wish I Had Known

Someone should have informed me that a puppy was going to be a pain in my backside! She whines, she poops EVERYWHERE (except outside, where she's SUPPOSED to go), she smells, she eats things she shouldn't eat....she is getting on my NERVES!!!! In my "patient" moments, I can handle it, but I'm, by nature, not a patient person and this dog works my nerves! It wouldn't be so bad if I weren't the ONLY person who could fool with her. It's not that my husband hasn't tried, but she refuses to potty outside for him. I'm not sure why that is, but she won't do it. She'll only potty for me. Go figure! So, I'm the one who has to go outside in the freezing cold or awful heat (whichever we're having that day) and wait for the dog to pee...or whatever. UGH!! I didn't want to regret the decision to get Alyssa a dog for her birthday, but I'm really starting to!

Weekend To-Do

I have several things to do this weekend. I don't feel all that great, so I don't know if I'll get them all accomplished or not, but I'm going to try.

1. LAUNDRY--I've already started on this, but I have SO much more to do!

2. work on stitching--been doing this, but I have to do more

3. take a picture of Piper--Alyssa needs one for school on Monday

4. clean my bedroom--it's a huge mess!!

5. clean Alyssa's bedroom--had this done, but try to convince a 5 year old to leave it clean!


That's all I can THINK of, at the moment, but I'm sure stuff will come up.

A Step

Most of you are going to laugh and think "what the heck?" when I say this, but I've taken, what I see as, a major step in my eating disorder recovery. It was a simple step, but a major step. I chewed a piece of gum for the first time in almost 3 years! Seems simple, but I haven't had any, mostly for fear that the peppermint would aggravate my acid reflux. But, I survived, as I was pretty sure I would. It's just GUM, after all. It's not like you technically "eat" it!

I've got to do something to help myself. I will die if I continue this way. I'm losing weight again and, for most that would be a great thing. But, for me, it's scary because I KNOW that I'm not getting the nutrition or sustenance that I need for survival. If I drop too much weight, I'm going to look as bad as I did 3 years ago, which was rather frightening!

Aftermath

Okay, I know this is like beating a dead horse, but I can't express how glad I am that this birthday and birthday party are OVER!!!! I love my daughter more than anything in my life, but this past few weeks have been incredibly tiring for me. I, singlehandedly, made 30 invitations, 20 goody bags, 24 cupcakes, 3 2-layer cakes, wrapped several gifts and bought a puppy! I'm TIRED!!!! But, the funny thing is, I would do it all over again. I didn't hate it. I loved seeing the look on my child's face and having her be the center of attention. As weird as it sounds, I almost wish that kids had 2 birthdays a year...not necessarily to AGE, because I don't want THAT to go any faster, but I enjoyed celebrating her existence, and I would love to get to do that more than once a year.